I’d planned on getting myself tickets for my birthday (In November), but when I found out Once Upon A One More Time was closing with less than 2 weeks notice, I knew I had to act fast. The last show was announced to be on September 3rd, which conflicted with my work schedule, so I decided to go the weekend prior. Did I empty my savings? Yes. I did. Did I get little-to-no sleep for about 72 hours because of traveling and then being on a literal twenty-four-hour-musical-high? Yes, yes I did. Did I loose almost 100 followers and receive some of the nastiest messages I’ve got since I became involved in this movement? Yes, I absolutely did. Do I have any regrets?
Not a single one… except maybe not buying tickets to see another showing. Once was not enough for Once Upon A One More Time. It was everything I needed it to be. The costumes, the sets, the music, the actors, all of it was just perfect. But the best part was how much I felt that this show truly did honor Britney, her light and why she is a beacon of strength and hope for so many. Here are some of my thoughts on this incredible show, and the actors that brought it to life.
Although I assume most everyone has heard about the plot – I will give you the abridged version: All the fairytale princesses decide it’s time to strike, and with some help from the O.F.G. (Original Fairy Godmother), these once helpless damsels in distress become the narrators of their own destiny.
Full transparency, I was extremely hesitant in going to this show. I was even more hesitant to come out in the open and tell everyone that I saw it. I mean, c’mon! I am the Britney Army General! There are a number of Britney advocates that are calling for a boycott of all Britney Brands until she is in financial control of her affairs, but is she in control or not? How do we know? And how can we find the answers on exactly when and how she lost the rights to her own name, and maybe most importantly what can we actively do to get control back to Britney?
I will tell you now, I (currently) have no answers to any of those questions. But what I do know is that none of us know definitively one way or the other, so we can’t assume she isn’t profiting from her brand at all – reports have been back and forth. Verifiable facts are hard to come by in the Britney movement.
Before I get back to gushing about the show, I want to address the amount of people (which I was totally anticipating) that verbally berated me, blocked me, took screenshots of me and my account and shared their opinions on wether I was a sell out, and to what degree I was helping “Team Con”.
Though conflicted, I supported the musical and honestly had one of the best days of my life, with my best friend, in my 6th favorite city on earth. I wore Britney’s new fragrance, Jungle Fantasy, which is legitimately my new favorite perfume, and donned a Britney Tee-Shirt (that was purchased post-conservatorship… ) not to mention while at the show I got so much merch’, I had to ask my bestie to carry half of it home with me. Maybe I should continue to boycott, but 2008 -2021 felt like long enough, for me. Everyone needs to do what is best for themselves. So, I have one message for anyone that thinks my seeing this show makes me a lesser fan, a bad Britney supporter or a sell out.
In the words of Maya Marie: Mind Your Business, Bitch.
NOW! I want to tell you all about my day trip to NYC! My Bestie (Nancy) and I left at the crack ass of dawn. I left my house around 4:45 and got to her a little past 5:30am and we hit the road for New Haven, CT. Now, I love my husband and kids, BUT A FULL DAY OF UNINTERRUPTED CONVERSATION WITH FANCY MISS NANCY IS A JOY IN AND OF ITSELF. We got to the train station, hopped on the metro north train and got to Central Station in what felt like the blink of an eye. (For anyone that ever wants to make this trip, note that there are outlets to charge your phone on the train, so it’s worth bringing one!) We ended up getting right into Times Square around noon, poked around the M&M store and had lunch at a place called Smith’s Tavern. After we had food, I smoked a fatty and we headed for the theatre.
The designated area’s to take selfies in the lobby of the Marquis Theatre were so fun, and Nancy was such a good sport, holding all my stuff and trying to take a good picture of me while I jumped and screamed in a tiny box. “Oh, no! Dude! Should I do it one more time? It needs to be centered, today is your big day!” You know, some friends just show how much they care about you with out even thinking about it.
After reliving Nancy from photography duty and holding my merch’ (which included a hoodie, a canvas bag, a poster, memorabilia cups and a pair of Britney shoe laces ) a nice usher handed us both bulky white bracelets and told us to “pull the little tab”, which we did. Nothing happened.
“It’s probably going to light up or something during the show”, Nancy’s always the brains of every operation. As I wondered if I’d just strapped a strobe light to my epileptic body, we finally took our seats. On the floor, center, row Q. As the show started I was a bit tense, and not just because I was worried I may have a seizure. I was genuinely nervous thinking, “What if I came all this way and it’s not any good? Or it doesn’t honor Britney…” But before I could even let that thought sink in, the lights went down, the music began and one of the actresses stole my heart.
(Spoiler alert, I did not have a seizure, it was not a strobe light. The minimal flash lighting in the show didn’t affect me at all.)
Now sure, this show was about the princesses, and needless to say each one was beautiful, had singing voices that just took my breath away (Snow White was a particular stand out) and the choreography felt really true to Britney’s style, but still had all the musical theatre campiness I need in any good show. Cinderella was adorably quirky with a squeaky voice that becomes more boisterous throughout her journey to find herself and control her own narrative. She was the perfect heroine for the story, but it was the Evil Stepmother that not only brought tears to my eyes, but lit a fire in my belly that, I can honestly say, I thought was snuffed out long ago.
There are a few roles that I have seen that make my whole body feel like it’s getting an electric charge of inspiration. This show had not one, but two of those types of characters that made me say “I WANT TO GET UP THERE AND DO THAT RIGHT NOW.” The first: The Evil Stepmother. Played by Jennifer Simard, she was one of the best parts of this show. When she sang Work Bitch, it took everything in me not to run up on that stage and start cleaning the floor as she commanded. Her rendition of Toxic…. I am getting choked up thinking about it. If Jennifer ever comes across these words, thank you – from the bottom of my musical theatre loving heart, for reigniting my love of theatre. When I heard the music that lights me on fire, Britney’s music, intertwined with the stage, the lights, the costumes – the theatrics! It made me realize that theatre is not in the past for me. Theatre is about more than stuffy outdated plot lines and a-typical casts. Theatre is about life. It’s about the connection an artist can make with an audience, by telling a story using their unique voice. This show, was clearly and obviously written by someone that understands what it means to truly love Britney’s Music.
Justin Guarani was another major highlight. To say he puts the “charm” in Prince Charming would be a huge understatement. He was hilarious, his voice was absolutely flawless – truly every note sounded so effortless, but his talent and skill is undeniable and his register is insane. When he swung from a chandelier and jumped down to the stage below, I felt like a little kid watching Sesame Street Live, bouncing and clapping like a toddler in my seat. He was such a delight to watch.
The costumes and set pieces were really wonderful, but I think the lights and tech were my favorite part of the sets (which for me is usually the case when seeing a live show – I’m a techie at heart). The only thing that pulled me out of the magic of this show was the occasional thought, “This is so sad it’s closing, this should be a movie. I never want this to end. This show deserves a longer run.” but before I could get too sad, the Step-sisters would come back out and suck me right back into the fairy-tale being so funny, I almost pee’d in my seat.
There really were so many wonderful moments, I couldn’t help but gush at a story line that brought two same gendered characters together in a beautiful and organic way. I had read somewhere it was contrived and it goes to show you how everyone interprets things differently. I found it to be simple and sweet. I could go on all day about each person involved in this show, but for the sake of time I will end on this one: The Original Fairy Godmother. Or as she is respectfully called, The O.F.G.
The O.F.G. was my favorite part of this show. She. Was. Everything. It felt like she was MY Fairy Godmother, truly. I needed to see that character. I am still beside myself that I got to see, up close, with my own two eye balls, Brooke Dillman.
Brooke has been one of my (and my children’s) favorite voice actors for a very long time. She’s in a number of shows we like, but one stands far above the rest in my household: Bob’s Burgers. Any episode featuring Brooke is often be re-played at our house. I love her as the Thunder Girls troop leader, oh! And when she plays a pushy magazine sales supervisor, oh-oh! The hip-hop dance teacher! That one is hilarious – bwahahaah “Looks like you’re battl’in'” lmfao! There are too many good characters she plays on that show, I can’t even pick one. She is just a riot. Her voice is so distinct, which I love. So, the very second she came on stage, one word out of her mouth and I almost screamed out “It’s you!” but instead I leaned over to Nancy and whispered, “that woman is from Bob’s Burgers”, to which Nancy said “Shut up, Dude! I am trying to hear!”
From her costume, to her wonderful singing voice, and BAD ASS DANCE MOVES, (OKAY GWORL I SAW YOU GETTIN’ DOWN WITH YA BAD SELF! YAAAAAAAS BROOOOKE!!!) The O.F.G. was incredible. I was just over the moon to watch Brooke bring to life a character that (not only do I desperately want to play someday!) made me realize that the best roles are the ones that allow you to show your best self. Brooke has a contagious personality. When she uses any vibrato in her voice, she commands the room completely. With every one of her entrances, she was surrounded by a stage filled with Princesses, but my eyes were completely fixed to her. She was, without a doubt, slaying as my favorite character of all time.
At one point, she was on a platform on the stage, with a screen behind her with (digital) speckles of gold floating behind her. I am in no way exaggerating when I say it felt like I had an actual out of body experience right in that theatre. As she sang Scream & Shout, it felt cathartic, as if she was expressing the frustration of the Justice for Britney Movement, knowing we need to fight, but having no idea where to begin. It DOES make me want to scream and shout, and The O.F.G helped me to remember, sometimes it’s okay to fight back, even if you’re not sure where to start. And it’s okay to believe that a happy ending, a truly happy ending, is worth fighting for. And no one gets to tell you what that looks like.
After the show ended, Nancy and I went back to the lobby to take some more pictures in the theatre and then headed back out to towards time square. Shortly after, I realized STUDIO CITY BARBIE was staying in New York and her hotel was facing the theatre where the show was playing! I had to try and meet up with her, so we met up at the Sugar Factory in Times Square and had drinks (Instead of my usual chocolate milk, I had a fancy cheesecake milk shake!) And after, said good bye to Studio City Barbie and went back to Grand Central Station.
Like I said, I have no regrets. I do wish I supported this show sooner. It hurts to know that the on-going questions we have about Britney being exploited prevented a lot of folks from going to the show. But I think at the end of the day… although I DID love this show… and everything was perfect and the cast was fantastic, my one criticism… it was too soon.
I would have loved if this show came out in 3 or 4 years from now, when fans & stans could focus on that. A lot of us are focused on the trial coming up and trying to figure out how to best support Britney. If they had just waited until after Britney has some time to heal, get her bearings in a world where she is free, or even waited until it’s more apparent if she is or not. Maybe she would have gone to opening night, or could have been a producer or done the choreography. But instead, this well-meaning juke-box musical is on the heels of such media scrutiny, a (not NEARLY PUBLICIZED ENOUGH) court battle with her oppressors and so much overall trauma and drama – I wish she (and her fans) had been able to take some time before they started big projects with her name. Of course, we are all still questioning: SHOULD WE BE SUPPORTING THE BRAND!? And let me be clear, though I have chosen to support some aspects of the brand, I still am skeptical and will continue to ask questions about Britney.
One person did ask me, “why have you chosen to support the musical, but not the Mind Your Business release?” and the answer is simple. Trust. I do not trust Will.I.Am. Not as far as I can throw him. Mr. I.Am lied in multiple interviews. One minute he was talking as if he had held Britney as she cried through her toughest moments – the next we was explaining that they were no more than musical co-workers. Which is it, Willie.My.Friend?! Are you two close or not? He also repeatedly dodged the biggest question: When was this recorded? A loose lipped Maxi (a friend of the weak-chinned-soon-to-be-ex Husband of Brit, Sam Asghari) likened the songs production to “forced labor” before saying “it sucks”. (It should be noted that Maxi then took back those statements, only to shortly after double down and retract his retractions) which only added to my hesitation to support this song. And at the very least, one can assume if Britney is not benefiting then Willie.I.Am is the one profiting and I flat out do not like Will.I.Am. (Oh! Like Sam I Am! I just got that! …You think he likes green eggs and ham?!) In contrast, by going to see the show on Broadway I supported live theatre, and Broadway no less, which means a lot to me.
Thank you again to the cast of Once Upon A One More Time, your performance was everything this Britney Army General needed. Thank you to my best friend, Nancy, for coming with me, my husband for watching the kids so I could go and most of all thank you to Britney Spears. Her music is a source of light and inspiration for so many. I know this is not the last time her art will be on Broadway. I think it will just take some time before audiences are ready to trust anything coming from the Britney Brand.
The world through my lens, through my eyes, is one big Britney Spears music video. Truly. When I drive in my car, I feel like I am filming the scene in Stronger when she is driving in the rain, no matter the weather or even if I have music on, that’s how I see my own experience. When I argue with Ethan about anything I feel like Britney at the end of Womanizer when she kicks the guys ass in his own damn bed. When I am nervous in any new situation, I just walk and strut as if I am walking into a nightclub beside Britney, like the intro to “Do Somethin'”. Britney is where I find my strength and confidence. Britney Spears is the soundtrack to my life. To see a full production, so flawlessly done, with the music that sets my soul on fire, was a legitimate dream come true.
BRITNEY ARMY 